I left it untitled , I really am not sure why. I suppose at the moment I want to worry less about titles and more about the content that I am about to unleash. the first eight posts were me treading lightly. There is that thing where you are afraid of letting out too much too quickly, hence you to tend to pinch data. you could say I was doing that. however, I have gotten to a point where I want to bear it all. my passion for writing and what drives me.
so the first eight posts were like an introduction on Kudzi the writer. Now I want to explore the work itself. I ask myself so many times why I have this attraction to the macabre.many a time I am able to answer with obvious answers like, I am a fan of mystery and puzzles. I don't like straight forward books. I want to be scared stiff, and a lot of stuff like that. But I have come to realize, though I hardly want to admit it, that I became a mystery writer in reaction to a traumatic experience I encountered as a little girl.
Back when I was fourteen, I had a close friend of mine and we used to have the best of laughs and the best of everything. We weren't inseparable, but we were close. she had a huge impact on my life, and I would like to believe that I had a huge impact on hers as well.
We were that close, we lived in the moment. In the present.
Then the unimaginable happened. She died after a brief but intense sickness. I remember I cried so hard. I don't think I ever cried like that afterwards. Anyway, I attended the wake, she was buried and life pretty much went back to normal.
At that moment I would like to believe that I pushed everything at the back of mind, and chose to act as if nothing had ever changed. Soon afterwards I began to write murder mysteries, because of the mystery I used to say.
But I suppose I am realizing, its because of my need to understand, maybe to come to terms, I don't know. I just know that when I write and someone dies, I feel a surge of emotions run through me. I weep for them. i experience pain as I put my self in the shoes of those who have just lost.
I started writing at 15, but to date I haven't written anything with those that have lost moving on
